Shawn Cannon: Cinderella's No Longer Sleeping, and She's a Beauty

Shawn Cannon has been in the "business" her whole life, and now is the owner/director of The Cannon Theatre in Littleton, MA.  Her goal for the theater is to direct and produce comedies that are wholesome and family-oriented.   Her latest play is The Importance Of Being Earnest and this has been her first season.  She also teaches private voice lessons and runs a show choir.   She gets her regular applause fix when she sings with her band, Blondes Have More Fun, on the weekends, and she still enjoys making others smile and feel good about themselves through theater and the arts.

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I have a love-hate relationship with theatre and the arts. I started performing at a very young age, singing with my sister and brother, in front of pretty large audiences.  I had been singing forever, or so it seemed-----and in fact, had learned by singing in the car with the whole family----my parents included.   I thought that it was what everyone did.

I still remember my first foray into the acting world.  I wanted to play Cinderella when I was in fourth grade and acted and sang my heart out, only to find out that another girl got the pretty Cinderella part, and that I was the ugly Cinderella----the one that sat in the ashes, and wore rags.  It was my first tough blow in the arts world.

I went on to keep singing, perfecting my voice by taking lessons, entering vocal contests, and getting a vocal scholarship.  I took the scholarship and attended college----wanting to major in voice and drama.   The world seemed to be my playground and I was sure that I was going to finally get everything that I wanted.

Fast forward a few years. I was young. I met a guy.  I got married. I got pregnant. I was just another nobody, all of the sudden.  My life changed drastically.  Now I had a very tiny responsibility to take care of and I had to put my dreams on the back burner.  It was a rude awakening, but I still kept that small blossom of hope deep, deep inside.  It was asleep, but still alive.

I continued to work at doing the things that I loved the most----well, the best I could between motherhood and general homemaker. I was a singing waiter. I did some local theater.  I sang in a few bands. I had three more children. I took acting classes. I directed a few plays. I wrote a few musicals. I did music directing. I choreographed a few shows. I costumed other shows. I did hair and makeup whenever I was pregnant.   I modeled and did commercials.

But I could never figure out how to make it all work. I knew that I wanted to make something of myself, but I kept choosing my children instead. I always REALLY thought in my small diva mind that someday I would be discovered and be famous.

Yeah.   Funny, huh?

We didn't have any TV shows back then, to go onto----aka American Idol or anything, and it was based, pretty much on luck....and being in the right place at the right time.  No matter what I tried, I was always going to be the girl that had to sit in the ashes and wear the rags.  I could never seem to wear the pretty dress and be the Cinderella that gets the prince.   This was what I hated about the business----never feeling like you are good enough.

Then one day, I had an epiphany.  It might have been more than one day----maybe a month or a year.   But, gradually, I begin to realize that my dream wasn't really based in reality.  I was fantasizing about a life that I couldn't possibly ever have----not being an active mother of five growing children and keeping the values and integrity that I tried to possess.  What I had been doing my whole life was what I loved doing the most-----working with children, directing others, doing music, singing, writing shows, doing costuming, and hair and makeup.   This was what I really could do----and do it well.

I realized that I didn't need to be famous to feel good about myself and what I do. I didn't need that validation from the world.   It only took a bright smiling face from a theater patron who had enjoyed a performance or a child that had started out terribly shy and then lit up the stage with her very first line----that was all I really needed to make me feel that I had succeeded.

I feel....now.....that my Cinderella has finally gotten her gorgeous gown.   The hope that was always sleeping deep inside----is more about bringing joy to others through theater and the arts.  It is my love. It is my passion.                         

I am finally alive.

As I read Shawn's post, I thought of The Mirror of Erised as well as Heather Simonsen's Patience to Get Up the Hill? 

Have you ever had that epiphany of thinking you weren't living your dream, but you really were?

P.S.  If you are looking for summer camps for your children, ages 6-17, Shawn's theatre camp really looks fun!

Comments

[Teresa]

Whitney, I don't know if you or Shawn selected the pictures for this post, but they're fabulous. I loved the idea of dreams I thought were Sleeping Beauties turning in to Cinderellas. I also appreciate that motherhood is what enabled/forced Shawn to develop her "real" dreams and talents, even while it felt like motherhood was really holding her back. I think that happens often--most of us just aren't self-aware enough to notice it. Thanks for a great post.

[Matt Langdon]

I just had this experience. I was working every day towards a dream that I didn't actually want. I was trying to get more and more business to support other people working for me.

One day I woke up and realised that if I just worked for myself, my real dream of making enough money to allow my family to travel every summer had already been reached.

It's amazing what the world makes you think your dreams are.

[Julia]

Shawn rocks - I am so glad you shared this!

[yvonne]

So often we let others or the world tell us what our dreams are or should be and what will bring us happiness. I'm so glad that Shaun discovered that our validation doesn't need to come from the world--reminds me of a recent talk from Sis. Julie Beck seeking "appreciation and affirmation from the right sources".

Thanks.

[Chrysula Winegar]

We're dealing with something in our family right now where it turns out a dream held for more than 20 years, and now being lived, is not what it seemed. There is a palpable grieving process that is going on as that dream, despite being achieved, now has to be let go and - here's the hard part - a new dream created and pursued.

Shawn, thank you for reminding us that dreams can be fulfilled in different packaging, and sometimes, they are the wrong dream and something better needs to replace them.

[Omgirl]

Well, I still feel like you used to, like my dream is out there. And I am not living it. I'm sure what i'm doing is worthwhile (i.e. kids) but it sure isn't my dream life.

[Julie]

One thing I love about Shawn's new dreams is that they create space for others to pursue theirs. Shawn's dreams have created space for my family, and I'm grateful. In a similar way, I enjoy singing, and I used to think, I'd never want to be the choir director because then I couldn't get to sing, and that's what I love. (And to be really honest, I loved the pats I got for singing.) But I found when I became choir director that the reward for creating space for others to sing, and helping them sing as a unified group, was so much more satisfying and meaningful. I've since thought the same must be true about teaching. Once I thought I'd only want to be the learner, but now I think I could really take joy in teaching.

BTW, you should all go see Shawn's shows. They're fantastic.

[carma]

Beautiful!! I've enjoyed Shawn's blog for some time now and am in awe of all that she does. I often wondered why she wasn't still modeling as she certainly could -- and now I know why - she has found her passion elsewhere...I admire her integrity in doing shows she can be proud of...

[Janna]

I think that it's fine to tweak a dream or even abandon one as long as we do so for something better. We often do not pursue a dream because we simply can't muster the emotional "chops," bravery, skills, etc. to get the thing done, and then chalk the failure up to, "Oh, I didn't want that dream anyway."

[Maria]

Love this post! Shawn echoes my experience in so many ways. I hope I can see one of your plays some day.

[Sheila Rhymes]

Shawn-This was a lovely condensed version of your amazing, productive and fun life. You just had your priorities in focus over time. You will always be the "beautiful Cinderella" to me and my most unforgettable onstage "star". Your wholesome, natural beauty and unbelievable talent has always and continues to be breathtaking. I'm honored to have known you "way back when" and wish like heck my showstopper granddaughter, Trinity, could attend your theatre summer camp! Big hug! Sheila Rhymes

[Heather]

Love you Sis....I'm proud of you!!!