An 'A' or an 'F' on the Galadriel test?

I recently read Stephenie Meyer's vampire trilogy, Twilight, Eclipse, New Moon, "the story of 17-year-old Bella Swan who moves to the small town of Forks, Washington to live with her father, and becomes drawn to Edward, a pale, mysterious classmate who seems determined to push her away. But neither can deny the attraction that pulls them together…even when Edward confides that he and his family are vampires."

To say I read these books is an understatement, inhaled or devoured are more accurate.

After picking up Twilight in the Cincinnati airport around 6pm on a Saturday, I began reading immediately, proceeded to read until 3am, and had finished all three books by the following Saturday. My friends that read the books also read them quickly. I couldn't help but use the descriptor "intoxicating", with the realization that the archetype of Western romantic love (girl and boy meet, their attraction is inescapable, their love immutable) continues to be a story that we love and live by.

Apart from not being able to drink deeply enough from these books, which is only marginally relevant to 'dare to dream', the fact that, in the third book, Bella importunes, even begs, Edward to make love to her, is.

I know this appears to be a non-sequitur, but stay with me.

First of all, you may be thinking, "Whitney, this is not unusual, men and women who are in love (and not in love) have sex before they are married all the time. It's a societal norm in the Western world."

And I would answer, yes, that is true, but not if you are a Mormon as I am -- and as is Stephenie Meyer. Mormons believe that a physically intimate relationship is so sacred that we wait until we are married, no matter how strong the attraction. (By the way, it is difficult; hormones are hormones regardless of race or religion).

So here's the 'dare to dream' point.

When I started reading Meyer's books, I knew she had gone to BYU, as had I, and is Mormon, as am I. Because I could identify with her on multiple levels, I was eager to learn from her about daring and dreaming.

So -- to get to her third book, New Moon, and read that Bella wanted to break with a belief that Mormons generally hold dear, rocked my world.

Alternately angry, but mostly sad, I have found myself repeatedly wondering:

1) While we are daring and dreaming -- For our dream to be embraced by a wide audience, do we have to part with cherished values?

2) Once we achieve our dream -- Because Bella's fervent plea didn't take place until the third book, long after Meyer's first two books were NY Times bestsellers, is it possible that once we achieve our dream, more and more influence becomes so irresistible that we can't help but grab onto the ring, and fail our Galadriel test?

Bottom line?

I don't know Stephenie Meyer; I purposely excluded her name from the blog title because I didn't want the focus to be her, but rather our having a discussion about what I think is a crucial question:

As we dream AND once we are achieving our dream(s), is it inevitable that we are corrupted by the power that we want or have? If corruption IS avoidable, how? In other words, how do we avoid going to Rachel's dark side, and pass our Galadriel test?

What are your thoughts?

Do you see this differently?

Can you think of women who have achieved a dream without sacrificing their 'who they are' along the way?

What about women who, having achieved their dream, and already wield considerable influence, continue to pass the Galadriel test?

For those of you that want to explore further the psychology of love, Robert A. Johnson wrote a marvelous book titled We, Understanding the Psychology of Romantic Love that looks at the myths our society has about love, using the story of Tristan and Iseult, and then looks at what love can be. I read this book several years ago, and can't recommend it highly enough.

Comments

[Matt]

I'm no Oprah student, but she seems to have kept a sense of self despite immense power. I remember not too long ago she mentioned something about not wanting to eat beef after the mad cow outbreak in the US. Sales plummeted immediately and she was virtually begged to recant her statement.

Another woman who gained power in a similar way to Stephanie Meyer is JK Rowling. She could have cheapened the legacy of Potter by continuing to write about him despite the initial plan for only seven books. The draw of money must have been immense.

[Whitney Johnson]

Thank you Matt.

As I read your comment, I couldn't help but think that if those who do make fairly public their set of beliefs (politicians also come to mind) aren't in a more difficult position as we the public have a standard by which to measure them by.

My best,

Whitney

[Benzion Chinn]

Bella is not Mormon so why should we expect her to live up to Mormon values. She is not a particularly religious person to begin with. It is Edward who has the "religious" values and this comes as a shock to Bella. (See New Moon) At the end of the day though Bella comes to accept these "religious" values and turns down pre-marital sex with the love of her life. As I see it, Meyer is keeping strong in her "Mormon" values and is not selling out.

[Amy]

I think we expect people who hold our same values to maintain those values. Knowing Stephanie Meyers is Mormon, in my mind, makes me want to hold her to a higher standard. If I didn't know she was Mormon I would have thought that this was an amazingly clean series of books, even with the reference to pre-marital intimacy. Is there more too it than expecting more of people because we know there beliefs? I wonder if it goes back to what you've talked about being feminine. It doesn't just hold true for women wanting power and not fitting the mold, but does it go the same for anyone breaking out of preceived guidelines.

[Whitney Johnson]

Before I respond to Benzion and Amy, what do the rest of you think? Especially those that have read this trilogy.

Benzion believes that Stephenie Meyer has been true to her values; Amy wonders if I would view this situation differently if the author were a man?

What do you think?

[Barbara Torris]

I truly do love commitments in relationships. When I was young we 'went steady', got engaged, got married and THEN experienced marital bliss!! It worked for us wonderfully.

Now that I am older the meaning of commitment has changed. I have learned that being committed has to come from the heart and mind. When the paper is signed it is a minor detail, all be it legally binding. I imagine that older people see it as a financial matter and not a romantic one.

As for sex, I feel strongly that this part of our live is so private that what we do and do not do should never be discussed outside of our relationship. This is the biggest commitment of all. The curtain needs to come down between the outward public part of our lives and that part that binds us together forever.

I think my point here is that while Stephanie Meyer is still probably a good and faithful Mormon she is also growing and trying to understand and write about the world around her. (note: I have not read her books) We do not always write what we believe but write other people's voices in order to understand.

Thank you for your comment. As for me and a novel...I would have no idea how to go about that. But I will write almost every day and then we will see. That elephant may be too big for me to eat.

[Amy]

I wanted to clarify, I don't think it would be differnt if the books were written by a man. What I think is, that like expecting women to be somehow less feminine by seeking power, are Mormons, or any other religious people, perceived differently because we know who they are or who we think they are supposed to be. I've read the first book and while I think it was excellently written and that she is a masterful storyteller, I won't read the other books. Why? Regardless of her religion, I didn't enjoy where I was taken as the reader. I think she hinted at what would happen in book three, it isn't a surprise to me that Bella is asking Edward to make love to her, they were all over each other in the first book, the natural progression of things seems to go there.

[Rose Alves]

I have read the trilogy and I agree with Benzion Chinn. There has been no mention of Bella's religious belief, so it is safe to say she is not Mormon, only the creater of the books is. So why should she have to make her characters in the book exactly like her. She has already commented that she would never put premarital sex in her books, so I don't understand your problem with it. Bella and Edward do not have sex, because Edward has some form of religion. He wants to get married first. Now, going into the fourth book, they are engaged, and are going to wait to try until after they are married. I guess I just don't understand your anger or issue with the books, or SM.