A is for Amy's choice: Full-time mothering

After reading my post about Stephenie Meyer's Twilight Series, Amy Sorensen and I exchanged several e-mails in which Amy shared that her dream right now is to do precisely what she's chosen to do: be a full-time mother. She shares her story below:

Almost a month ago Whitney asked me to guest blog and in the midst of the holidays I put it off and then after the big holiday push my grandfather died and I flew to Boise to celebrate his passing with my parents, aunts and uncles and cousins I haven'€™t seen in forever. It truly was a beautiful celebration, my grandfather was 95 years old and ready to die. We laughed over stories about his garden and the menacing squirrels and it was nice to be with family.

Amy's twin Chris, photo courtesy of Amy Sorensen

It has taken me several weeks to figure out what to say here and how to say it. Whitney asked if I would tell a little about myself and my dream journey. I grew up in Las Vegas, NV, finished my degree in communication studies from UNLV and met my husband, an officer in the Air Force, by the time I was twenty-five. We both wanted a family so shortly after we were married I found out I was pregnant. I was excited and scared and nervous. I was a journalist and publicist for a small publishing company in Vegas and I was worried about what I knew I would do next. I knew that I would leave the professional world behind and become a mom. I knew it would be hard, and it is. I am a dirty and tired mommy most days; I'€™m a taxi driver and a librarian and a teacher. I was a military wife and now I am a student wife with my husband working on his masters. I play and have played so many roles.

When I started reading Whitney's blog I thought what is my big dream? Was my big dream to be a journalist and did I let that slip by? I am a dreamer by nature, I like to think of all the things I could do, all the avenues I could take. I could do so many things. And as I have thought about this precious gift of life I have been given I realized that I am already living my big dream. For me the big dream is to have children who are mostly well adjusted, happy and successful. I want a relationship with my husband that will last and that we will enjoy being together even after 50 years of marriage. For me the best way to achieve these goals is to be at home. I can do whatever I want. I choose this dream; this is the most important thing for me right now.

I could be that writer and I do photography as a paid hobby, Thanks Whitney for encouraging me to have multiple dreams and to follow them. I started a blog and I have started a small business taking family pictures and shooting special events. But even in working with my photography I am still the mom, and the most important thing to me is to be the mom.

Amy's children, photo courtesy of Amy Sorensen

With the military we have moved from Las Vegas to Southern Georgia to Central Massachusetts and back west to Utah to attend school. And I am the constant in my children'€™s life and I enjoy being that. I figure someday I'll get the opportunity to go to New York and work at a magazine and someday I'll get to go on photo shoots to remote locations and spend hours just taking pictures. But right now I am living my first dream to be the mother of my children.

Please do take a moment to re-read the Pew Research Center post which I've flagged below. Why do you think we don't do a better job of acknowledging and affirming our own decisions as well as those of others?

Do you see in Amy's decision a hero's journey as outlined by Psyche? Especially Psyche's first task -- the sorting of the seeds?

Have you noticed how Amy is already harnessing her passion for photography in service of her feminine impulse to connect and collaborate?

I would encourage you to click into Amanda DeCardy's blog, an 8th grade teacher in Shanghai, in which she she also affirms her love of mothering. And of course there's Jane Clayson Johnson's book, I am a Mother.

Finally, for those of you that have had the chance to read Jean Shinoda Bolen's Goddesses in Everywoman, which archetype do you believe most closely aligns with the dream of mothering?

Related posts:
Pew Research Center's "Fewer Mothers Prefer Full-Time Work"
Mothering matters
Psyche's 1st Task -- Sort the seeds
It takes courage to tell our stories
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Comments

[Macy]

Thanks for posting this, Whitney. Amy puts into words what I've been feeling. I'm living what I have dreamed about. I keep thinking I should be doing something else with my time, but I really love what I'm doing. It was nice to read that someone feels the same way.

[Barbara Torris]

Whitney, I have posted the article you inquired about. Hope you enjoy it.

I wish you could meet Amanda see her interact with her children. She is so amazing and the influence of her parenting shows in Maddie. I think the thing I love most about her mothering is her willingness to wait for things to happen. There is not rush to punishment for behaviors that are age appropriate. Redirection goes on all the time. I love that. As a result Maddie is growing into an independent but loving little girl.

Thank you so much for the nod to her.

b