Why Technology Makes me Happier

This past week, Jennifer Aaker tweeted the following, referring to an article Technology Will Make You Happier, asking the question -- Why?    

Here's my answer:

Technology is enabling the finding of my voice.  I wrote in a 2007 blog post titled What If?, "the ease of blogging (have computer, can publish -- no rules to play by or political waters to navigate), many who would never have dreamed of being published in the world of old media, are now pointing, clicking and publishing here in the blogosphere."

That technology enables voice-finding has been true not only for me, but countless others.  Consider Chrysula Winegar.  In 2009, she talked of searching for her voice in the post Oh My Goodness, I Left My Voice on the Bus.  Less than a year later, Chrysula hosted a UN Digital Media Panel titled Changing the World, One Mother At a Time. Because she blogs and twitters, Chrysula's voice is no longer languishing on the bus.  As is the case with many of you, her voice is beginning to drive the bus.

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Technology is helping me change my corner of the world.  A dear friend of mine recently sent me an e-mail that went something like this:  my husband and children are thriving.  I, on the other hand, am not; I am a middle-aged, boring woman who doesn't know what she wants to do.

My friend really believes what she said, but some of it is patently untrue.  It is irrefutable that she is getting older, as are we all; you can read my birthday lament/musings here.  But her husband and children are thriving, in part because of the woman she is, and the home she has created.  The assertion that she is boring, that there is no future ahead of her, isn't true, no matter how true it may feel.  I know her to be smart, dynamic, wise, and beautiful.

Similar conversations with other close friends led me to start this blog.  If even one woman dares to dream because of what I've written, I will have helped change my corner of the world.

Technology is allowing me to connect with and build community.  When we feel connected to others, we are happier, thanks to oxytocin.   My blog is a virtual water cooler where old and new friends swap stories about daring and dreaming.  Twitter is a farmer's market of ideas.  As I participate in this idea bazaar, I am creating a community of professional peers.  And Facebook -- who hasn't reveled in the outpouring of birthday wishes?

Source:  istockphoto

My on-line network of professional female peers was particularly important this past week as I prepared to attend an industry conference for hedge fund, private equity and venture capital professionals.  Hundreds would be in attendance, but only about ten women, if I'm being generous.

This tends to be problematic because transitioning conversations with male conferees from talk of family and friends to shop talk tends to be difficult, dispiriting even, occasionally causing me to feel invisible.  Because the value of industry conferences is mostly about the networking, I consequently have to work pretty hard to get a return on my time, money and energy.

As I prepped for this year's event, Cali Williams Yost, a woman in my virtual network, encouraged me, rallied me me even, telling me that really showing up was important, not only for me, but also for the women who come after me.  That on-line conversation was pivotal.  Without technology, I wouldn't know Cali.   And I am happy to report that I not only talked to more people than in previous years, and I talked more shop.  In other words, I really showed up, and claimed my place.    

***

Nearly all of us want to find our voice, to change our corner of the world, and to feel connected. 

Technology can help us do all three -- and that makes me happy.

Does technology make you happier?

Comments

[Chrysula Winegar]

What an honor to wake up to this today. Technology has been the vehicle for critical relationship building, sourcing of ideas, opinions and creating a collective virtual advisory board for my ideas.

My co-panelists on the above conversation were found through friends I had made on twitter. Emily and Kristina and I never actually met until about an hour before our presentation, but because of our on-line relationships, based on authenticity, we found instant chemistry and trust.

The experience also showed me that "in real life" is still just as critical, such as the hug or phone call from a friend - so the warm exchanges can be done by voice and touch. Gratitude to you. On so many levels.

[Amy Jo]

Loved hearing about that side of you and your mystery life. Anything that happens outside of my home is sometimes a mystery, but your value to me and others like me will only be known later. Sometimes I too feel boring, but know at some time, when I'm able, I will be dreaming. Love you!

[EHD]

All of this is true, and I think Whitney (and Chrysula) have done an amazing job in using technology to create meaningful places for women to connect and come to understand their value.

Having said that, I am somewhat mystified by the blog craze. When people refer me to their blogs, I think, "I don't have time to write in my own journal. Do I really have time to read yours? Do I matter so little to you that you can't click "send" to update me on your life with an individualized e-mail?"

I worry that technology is displacing the face-to-face contact and communication that truly are the basis of community. When I have a childcare crisis, I want someone who is physically close enough to help! Nothing replaces the physical gathering of women, which I love (and technology does help facilitate this).

Good luck this week, Whitney! There is a lot to be said for being a pioneer. It isn't comfortable, but it is so incredibly valuable to everyone who comes after you. Knock 'em dead! :-)

[Stacey P]

I loved that you did more than show up - as a glad recipient of your trail blazing efforts I applaud the courage it took to show up with style
ATTA GIRL!

[Jenny]

YES! Technology makes me happy too--and your blog has been the motivator behind MUCH of what has made me feel non-boring and a real contributor to whatever I devote my time and energy to. Kudos to you, Whitney, for continuing to be a trail blazer for women who aren't conferencing in person (for so many varied reasons) but dare to take that first step towards living the dream--whether via "the blog craze" or any medium that technology has so generously afforded us.
XO

[Megan N.]

Whitney, I'm so glad you went to that conference (if it's the one I'm thinking of), because that's where I met you a few years ago. I was one of the (fewer than 10) women there, and what a blessing it was to meet you and receive your genuine arm of support as I've "dared to dream" and launch into my life as a young finance professional. Way to represent the ladies. Thank you.